Tragedy and Triumph: March 2023

Jo Ann’s photo app randomly put together the above slideshow. Grama Farris is in most of these photos! Take a look…it is an absolutely incredible slideshow…Grampa Farris would have loved it!

Skating at one of the two Long Beach roller rinks, 17 year old Freda Belle (Saville) Farris first met John Richard Farris Jr. (21). Finding good chemistry, they were soon a couple, dancing to the beat of the big bands playing the southland. What long range plans were they had were altered in the face of Pearl Harbor and they married 11 days later.

A competent typist, Freda applied to Douglas Aircraft, missed orientation day, and started on the assembly line riveting and bucking, tasked composed for two men. Eventually her small size led to inspecting tall cones of the military version of the DC-3.

Freda moved to join her husband when the army air corp assigned him to a training base in Douglas, Arizona. Securing day care for their one and a half year old daughter, Sandra Lee (Chilcote), she picked up her tools and began patching trainer aircraft.

Freda hoped to delay recognition becoming pregnant but x-rays showing twins (Patrick Brent and Michael Kent) resulted in promptly to a ride in a private rail car of possibly General Doolittle, with Sandra amusing their hosts on the way to L.A., practicing perfect table manners.

A true “Baby Boomer,” John Richard Farris (also Jr. followed in ‘46, eventually backed up by Dan Roy in ‘53 and Penny Eileen (Fregeau) helping to bracket the boys in ‘58.

Freda was born on Easter Sunday 1924, the 5th of seven kids, to Leah (Hancock) Saville of Texas and to Iowa born John Roy Saville. The family moved away from Tulsa after the 1919 riot and settled on a southwest Oklahoma farm near Mountain Park.

A Depression, the family splitting up, and the Meningitis Quarantine did hurt, but good friends, the works progress administration and landing in California helped.

In Long Beach, Freda learned to can tuna, chase chickens, drive, paint portraits, and vote. She helped the PTA, scouts, Blue Birds and Bobbi Sox, facilitated swim and music lessons and tutored French. An extended family of relatives and friends went beyond her 23 direct decedents and she loved them all.

Freda entered Doctor’s Hospital on Thursday afternoon with a low oxygen count and Covid-19, and stopped breaking Friday morning, March 3rd, about 10 am.

A short graveside service will be held Friday, March 17, 2023 at Forest Law Cypress, at 10:30 am. Freda was a charter member of the Palo Verde Avenue Christian Church where an 11:00 o’clock service, Saturday March 18 will be held: 2501 Palo Verde Ave in Long Beach.

Click above to enlarge Mike’s handwritten biography about Freda Belle Saville Farris

Grama and Mom Freda “Freddie” Farris died yesterday March 3, 2023 at 10:15 am Pacific time. She’s been a part of my life for almost 45 years when I met my husband Dan Farris. She was the kindest person ever. I always called her Mom and in later years I called her Grama. I will miss her so much. She would have been 99 years old on April 20, 2023.

She was the mother of six children and had nine grandchildren, five great grandchildren, and three great-great-grandchildren. She had at least 14 nieces and nephews and at least five grand nieces and nephews.

I wrote the following to a friend this morning at about 8 am 3/4/23:

“Good morning. I didn’t tell you last night that after my husband flew back to Long Beach, California from Sun Valley, we think he got Covid on the plane or at the Las Vegas airport where there was a layover. That was Wed 2/22/23. The next day (a week ago Thursday 2/23/23), Dan didn’t feel good and took a Covid test and tested positive. He isolated from his mother and sister and brother, but it was probably too late. Then, this past Thursday afternoon, his mother’s doctor said she needed to get to the hospital when Dan’s brother tested her oxygen level and it was very low. They saw that she was not eating, but they had no idea she had Covid. When she got to the ER late Thursday afternoon she tested positive. Then she died the next morning, yesterday, at 10:15 Pacific time. Covid seems to kill old people fast. I really am sad even though she was so old. Thanks for caring; it means so much to me.”

Dan has been in Long Beach since early June 2022 helping his 80 year old sister Sandy and 79 year old brother Mike take care of their mom. We haven’t spent time together since Dan has been needed in Long Beach except for 10 days in November 2022 and for two and a half weeks in January-February 2023 when he flew out to Colorado Springs to help me drive me back to Sun Valley, Idaho. Did my need for my husband to be with me cause my mother-in-law to die of Covid since she got it from my husband? I am feeling so guilty, but other have told me not to think those thoughts, but it is so hard.

My darling daughter Rebekah wrote the following on Facebook yesterday which gives such a wonderful picture of her life:

“Grandma, when I think of you I’m sitting in your house as the sun comes in through the windows, your paintings cover the walls, along with photos of every member of the family and many more friends, the books are on the coffee table and wherever a few more can be squeezed in, grampa’s model airplanes are hanging in my dad’s old room. Outside, there is a garden that you’ve tended for years. Maybe later we’ll pick some lemons, or tomatoes, or avocados. Dinner is coming up and I know it will be as delicious as it always is, especially because your making my favorite mashed potatoes. Afterwords we’ll watch Bob Ross videos or a movie and you’ll braid my hair with your gentle yet strong hands.

I’ll always picture you this way. You brought my family together in a way that can never be replaced. Above everything, you were loving and kind. You never asked for much and had a very simple life, but you were loved by everyone so so much. I can only be grateful to have been your granddaughter. I will miss you so very much.

Rest well, thank you, I love you.

Freda Farris

1924 - 2023”

Here’s a response from my dear cousin Luci to Rebekah’s post:

“JoAnn, what a lovely tribute Rebekah wrote about her grandmother. You have very special and talented children. In case you miss my comment off FB, this is what I wrote in response to her essay:

Rebekah, what a beautiful tribute to your grandmother. I feel I know her through your lovely words. G-d bless you and your family at this time of great loss. And, tonight, there will be a new, shining star in the night firmament winking at you. Blow her a kiss for me.

It brought a tear to my eyes. Such special words and feelings.”

Here’s a comment from my sweet cousin Cherie:

“JoAnn and Dan, I'm sorry for your loss. You took such good care of your mom in her later years and I know you will have many memories with your mom. I feel so glad that she had such a loving family. Sincere condolences to you all!”

My husband Dan wrote the following yesterday about his very special mom:

“How do I sum up a lifetime of memories of my Mama, our dear Gramma Farris? I once came home with a black eye from the only fight I had in my life, and she calmly rolled some ice in a tea towel to make me feel better, and told me she was proud that I had stood up for myself. She believed in me and never betrayed any doubts of my success (which every mother must have of their sons). She endured a lot of pain over the years, having surgery twice to remove goiters, having her “sick headaches” which were not treated properly for decades. And she took care of me whenever I was sick, never complaining of the pressure and drudgery that came with raising six children.

The thing that distinguished her from everyone else was her willingness to put others before herself. She felt success in our success. We will not see anyone like her again.”

Yesterday afternoon, my daughter Annabelle wrote this amazing tribute below: (I love you Sweetie):

“This morning I got the news that I have been dreading for years, my grandmother died. My grama Freda was 98, having lived a full life full of adventure and love. My grama was an artist, she painted spectacular portraits of our family, and her paintings sparkled with life. I always admired her and her pieces, she was my earliest inspiration for my art. I remember being about six or so, telling her I was going to be an artist just like her, and she said to me “no, you are going to be a famous artists,” but to me she was one of the masters, her work was more beautiful to me than anything. Whenever I was in California, my parents would take me to my grandparent’s house, I would go to painting classes with my grama and I admired all of the woodwork and engineering my grandpa did, I knew I was so much like both of them and wanted to make them proud. My grama is a big reason I am still pursing a career in art, she has always believed in me and has loved seeing my progress over the years, and I am so fortunate to have had such an amazing and loving role model.

Grama, I really miss you and will forever remember all of our times together having fun watching Bob Ross, talking about great art, and how much you gave and loved us all.”

Dan’s youngest sister Penny wrote the most amazing thing which is below:

“My beautiful Mother had to leave us this morning. She would have been ninety-nine next month. I'm so blessed to have had her for my Mother. Mom taught us so many valuable life lessons by example. Not one to tell people what to do, she simply lived a kind, caring, and unselfish life that spoke volumes. My Mother fervently believed in her children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and great-great-grandchildren. Mom and Dad were married for sixty-eight years. Saying goodbye to the second parent is kind of like saying goodbye to them both again. My mom told me a story when I was a little girl. Her Mother, my Grandmother, was orphaned at the tender age of nine. On her death bed, her Mother said, "I'll see you in heaven." Although my Grandmother lived a long life, she always looked forward to the day that she would see her Mother again in heaven. I, too, want to live the life God has planned for me to its fullest. Yet, I will long for that day when I see my Mother again in heaven. Until then, I will try my best to honor her memory and miss her very much. Well done, Mom. I'm so proud of you.”

My son Joel has not written anything yet, but I can write out some of what he is thinking:

Grama Farris for Joel was just so sweet and kind. She was always so gentle to him. She had so many grandchildren, but loved each one equally. When he went into her house, he always felt so at home. She knew he was a picky eater, but made sure he always had food to eat that he liked.

He is so glad that she got to see him perform in Disney On Ice in December 2019 just before Covid hit the world. He also misses Grampa Farris.

He just appreciated her so much.

Joel is not only grieving the loss of his Grama, but Grandpa Schneider too. He is grieving the life we had since we took care of him in his homes in Larkspur, Colorado and in Belmont Shore (Naples Island), Long Beach, California. Joel was living in the Larkspur house for years during his breaks from traveling the world with Disney On Ice.

Joel was the one that noticed Grandpa was not breathing and was the first family member to notice he died. Joel had to leave Colorado the next day to teach skiing in Sun Valley and didn’t know he would not ever return to “Larkspur” (his home for seven years) again.

Also, the last time Joel saw Grama Farris she was doing okay, but Joel didn’t know then he’d not return to Long Beach since the Schneider family condo was sold and not be able to see his Grama again.

Joel says, “Grama: I remember when you let me stay with you and Grampa and were so welcoming. And…you always encouraged me with positivity and love. I remember you made really good food. Sorry I was so picky. You were the most amazing cook! Thank you for coming to my show. I pulled strings for you to come and watch me in ramps. Thank you for being so kind. Grama, I love you.“

My sister Lynnellen wrote the following text to me yesterday afternoon shortly after Grama Farris died:

My heartfelt sympathies to Dan and family

I know how hard it must be for everyone hope all are doing as well as they can

She was a lovely warm giving person

I have many fond memories of her kindness , memories of Drew at her house . She was always so sweet

Please tell Dan I feel so sad for him and I send him my love and good thoughts ❤️

Dan’s niece Julie Chilcote wrote the following today:

“I am still at a loss for words. My ❤️ hurts as a large part of who I am passed yesterday. My very much loved Grandma, Freda Farris, passed away yesterday morning. She was the matriarch of our family and left us with a beautiful legacy. My grandpa & grandma instilled so many values and virtues that make up who I am, and shaped our family. They were both very much my heroes. She would had turned 99 years old next month. So glad that we had a wonderful visit with her last year. My heart is comforted knowing she is at peace now. To all of my family....sending you love & comfort at this time. ❤️”

Julie’s son Bryce and Grama

And…Julie wrote more on Sunday, 3/5/2023:

Thank you everybody for the kind words & love shared about the passing of my beloved grandma. I found this heartfelt moment when we were saying goodbye to my wonderful grandpa 13 years ago. In the midst of her loss, she was more concerned in that final time that each of her children, grandchildren, & great-grandchildren knew just how much they were loved by she & our grandpa. This wonderful woman selflessly loved us in so many ways and made everybody she met feel welcome & worthy. I look forward to the day when I can give you a big hug again, & we can practice our French together. I ❤️ you forever, Grandma...