This is the Schneider-Farris Family's Blog. Keep up with what we are doing by logging into this site regularly! (The reason this site is called "Tragedy and Triumph" is that when I first founded this site, my husband, Dan, had been in a horrible accident, and he recovered. His recovery was a miracle! Go back to the 2005 archives to read our story.)

Saturday, October 11, 2025

Apology letters that did not work

I sent the letters below during the time between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.  I did receive a acknowledgement reply from Amy.  After reading her reply I realized that my efforts towards reconciliation have been futile.



My follow up letters are below.  






 
From Amy above - (the perpetrator became the victim)

——————————————————

Here’s a response I wrote but never sent:

From Jo Ann:

 Amy:

Thank you for writing me an email and acknowledging you received my card. 

I wasn’t going to respond since some of your words hurt,  but I have done a lot of thinking after reading your email and I want to send some of my thoughts to you.

I thought it was nice that you said that someday, in time, you hope that there could be some interaction and that my family might eventually be cordial with one another.

Reaching out to you during the past almost four years to try to heal things just seemed the right thing to do, but after reading your words and after trying to apologize and say I am sorry more than once and then being reminded of all the mistakes I made after the most recent apology where I did not even expect a response, rest assured that I (we) no longer care to be in contact or interact with you and Billy.

I have nothing against Phoebe and Charlie, so if they wish to be in contact with me and Dan and Rebekah, Joel, and Annabelle, that is their choice.

Annabelle did not want to invite Billy and your family and Lynnellen and her family to her wedding, but I insisted. I felt that if your family and Lynnellen and her family were not invited, that would mean that we truly wanted no interaction with any of you ever. If I had known then you and Billy and Lynnellen didn’t want interaction, you would not have been invited at all.

Each invitation Annabelle sent cost her money.  I told Annabelle I would pay for your family and Lynnellen’s family if any of you did attend and reimburse her for the cost of the invitations sent to you and Lynnellen and her family.

Billy was one of the first to reply to Annabelle’s wedding invitation .  When he did not accept the invite, Annabelle was relieved since she did not want any of you at her wedding anyway.  I was relieved since I didn’t need to pay $100 a person for your family and Lynnellen’s family.

We were glad that Cori came via Zoom though.  If she had wanted to come in person I would have gladly paid for Cori and her fiancĂ©.  By the way, I guess these recent communications mean Cori may not invite us to her wedding?  I love Cori and would very much want to be there if she wanted us there.

I could go on and on about every detail that happened since my father’s death.

Some of what occurred could have been a misunderstanding.  

In summary,  I felt bullied by Billy and Lynnellen.

I had thought for a while that it might be a good idea to at least get a professional family mediator involved so the things that prompted me to hire a lawyer could be understood.  Also, I thought Billy and Lynnellen could better understand why I felt bullied. Communication is always a good thing.

I was urged to get a lawyer by more than one person because I was told that Billy and Lynnellen were pushing me into making decisions that I did not agree with.

My dad “gave” Lynnellen the house in Belmont Shore before his brother Bobby died. Daddy did not break the news to Bobby, but Bobby did find out and finding out killed him. He had waited 20 years to get his share of Grandma Fannie’s estate and got nothing.  I felt that the proposed delay to not sell the Long Beach condo and have Drew rent it instead was similar when I was told by Angela Kruse that the estate would not close until all property was sold. I was not going to wait 20 years like Uncle Bobby did, so getting a lawyer was necessary.

As far as using social media to share the pain I experienced is just what I do.  I had no idea that some of your friends were reporting what I shared on Facebook. 



Tuesday, October 07, 2025

Sunday, October 05, 2025

A 50 year old amazing encounter!

One of the alumni I met at the 2025 Colorado College Homecoming weekend (October 2–5, 2025) was Frank Purdy (class of 1975).  He remembered me because he wrote for the school newspaper THE CATALYST and an article that featured me was published in THE CATALYST in 1975!  In addition he asked me to write an article about the World Figure Skating Championships that took place at THE BROADMOOR in 1975.  Both articles are below.  Can you imagine my surprise to find out he remembered this from 50 YEARS AGO!!!!!





 

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Jo Ann Schneider Farris has participated in skating for most of her life as a competitor, coach, and author.

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